I’m reading a green text post here, and then the comments are analysing the situation as if this is r/amitheasshole. What’s going on Lemmy?
Lemmy has a unique community. Lots of thinkers. Personally, I love reading when people start seriously interpreting greentexts.
I’ll never understand how difficult people make things by not being forthright and making things awkward:
“Is it okay if I bring my boyfriend?”
“…I think there’s been a misunderstanding. I had asked you on a hike as a fun first date, I didn’t realize you had a boyfriend. I’m going to bow out of this, but I can give you the hike info if you want to take him.” And then you laugh about the misunderstanding the next work day, and keep things at work from then on. No reason for it to get bad. Flirting is still fun! Just leave it at that without expecting anything more.
Don’t flirt with someone single if you’re not interested, don’t flirt with someone in a relationship if you’re not interesting in breaking it.
It’s just that simple.
Some people think flirting means they want more.
“Why can’t men understand hints?”
Welcome Anon to the confusing gameshow of “Is she flirting or is that just how she is with friends!” /s
I kinda want to know what Anon and his “female coworkers” thinks counts as flirting. Simply being nice to someone and having fun talking to them isn’t flirting, as much as some guys might like to think it is. Now if she was a more touchy person, I can see how that’d be mistaken, as being touchy is also a common way of flirting.
Though find it odd that she waited until the very last minute to ask if her boyfriend could come. And also, guessing “I’m no longer interested” is paraphrased, cause nobody on 4Chan is mature enough to not make things incredibly uncomfortable at work after this.
Completely possible anon was a creep and she felt uncomfortable saying no.
fake, anon had a girl interested in him
gay, he almost had a three way
It’s kinda weird to wait until the last minute to ask if someone else can come along on a planned outing.
But the rest? I dunno. Looks like a pretty standard mixup.
OP had a chance at a three way and dropped the ball…
Hike sound like 1st date PC to anyone? I mean, it depends on the definition of hike but someone I barely know dragging me to an isolated place in the woods somewhere sounds like a legit way to end up being drug through the woods with a much higher probability than the typical coffee shop date.
Also, who doesn’t have work-mances without deeper meaning? I always have beer after work bros and lunch/break dates with my coworkers but that has no meaning beyond. In fact, I’ve always had a strict rule of never shit in my own back yard. If I was so inclined as to date someone from work, I would not do so until after finding a new job.
Arguably, they know each other from work, so it’s not like the guy could just bury her somewhere remote and act like nothing happened. If she tells other people about the date, police will surely come and ask him.
what do you mean by “1st date PC”?
Probably “Personal Choice”
politically correct in a more social the kind of thing a person should do context, like cultural norms
oh huh ok that was the only thing that made any sense but it seemed like a weird context for that term.
to answer the question I think it really depends on the person but I wouldn’t wanna go on a hike with anon, that’s for sure.
Sounds normal to me, but I think you’re right that it depends on what they mean by “hike.” Around here, a casual trail walk in an area that’s likely to have other people around would not be beyond the pale… But like a back country slog where you park on the shoulder of a secondary highway 45 minutes out of town would.
2 weeks is just not that deep. seems like the woman just wants some friends. weird to bring your bf along but op shouldn’t have assumed date
Yeah, how could he have taken the hints? So presumptuous of him. She must’ve brought up her boyfriend so often and he just ignored it. /s
“I always do things by myself”
“I have a boyfriend”
So… Which is it???
Definitely sending mixed signals not mentioning her boyfriend and saying she has to do things alone, but not sure how that qualifies as “using”. Hiking isn’t really something people “use” others for, it’s not like he would have been carring her the whole time. If she was getting him to do her job when he was talking to her then yeah, but this doesn’t mention anything like that. She could very well have just wanted a friend to talk to at work and didn’t know how to bring it up after a while…
Maybe I’m overthinking this…
hahaha 🍵
If I had the time and patience, I’d offer a rebuttal green text as this one skips quite a bit of salient information. Feels over-edited. Wonder what anon did to her to make her instantly run away.
I’m starting to think: it was a dumb attempt to say ‘anon, wanna become bf?’ since he’s the only other person going, but landed badly.
Or it’s fake and gay.
Yeah, that’s just plain weird.
