Let me set the stage: Newly single dad of a young kid. After COVID-19 I haven’t done much outside of my home and taking care of my kid. I work full time-remote, and between the kiddo and leaving room for a hobby or taking care of the house, it seems like the only other thing I have time for is sleep.
The thing I know is that this is likely an issue with my anxiety and anxious attachment. The conclusion we’ve arrived at in therapy is that I gotta meet people. I apparently forgot, or don’t know how to do that. Where to meet people. It’s not a big city, but 200k-300k people in the county.
Maybe I’m looking for something of a strategy more than anything.
edit: thank you guys, I really appreciate it!
Meetup.com can be a blessing but it depends on the area. Definitely going to events you find fun and doing thing you find fun, but with a group. Going out alone and chatting people up. Honestly, if you can find a single dads group in the area, you are golden. And if you can’t… build it and they will come.
You’re a new single dad
You’ve already indicated you don’t have time that is pretty normal. Dual parent households usually take a couple years to get their social lives back on track unless they can afford a nanny
Join a disc golf league with your bambino strapped to you
After Covid I landed on a remote job too.
When I felt it was safer to socialize with people I started to rollerblade and got to know a group in my city that gathered in a park and they teached me a few tricks. Now I go there and teach new people too.
I’m not saying that rollerblade is the best thing you can do but there’s a chance that you can share this experience with your kid and meet a few new people. Maybe try skating, biking, tennis… There’s a ton of options out there that can make you physically and mentally healthier
You use the kid as bait. Haha. I mean, you can take the kid places and meet other parents. If you like them, you can suggest your kids get together to play… which means you guys hang out.
Volunteering is always good. Meals on Wheels. Habitat for Humanity. See if the local library system has organized public events. Same for parks. You could take a continuing education class, too. Cooking, art, personal finance.
I think this is the best advice. These kinds of social gatherings take the pressure off socializing, you’re there because of something else and socializing is a side-effect. That feels nice for all parties. Choose something that is close to a honby or interest of tours, that way you’ll be more likely to meet likeminded people. Good luck OP and remember, you’ve got years to do this, you dont build up a social life in one or two weeks.
Edited to add sports, they’re great in melting the ice. Board game nights if that’s your cup of tea. Fantasy sports leagues
Go to a bar, lean on the bar with a stiff, respectable drink, talk to strangers.
