Yours, mine, and everyone else’s happiness has value. I get that’s not the point you were trying to make. All I am trying to say is that a utilitarian approach to your own happiness will almost always leave you unhappy. You deserve to be happy just as much as anyone else.
Nice little qualifier you added there. Cause it’s generally accepted that the God of Abraham ordained killing at least two million people prior to the birth of Jesus Christ. I get the sense that you’re perspective is that if God does it then it must be just and you want to prove anyone who thinks otherwise is wrong. If that’s the case, you’re in the wrong place my friend.