The other day I made butter chicken and it was one of the best butter chickens I’d had, at least as good as restaurant quality. Can’t wait to make it again and it was my 2nd try ever so I think I nailed it pretty quick. Wicked proud of that.

I didn’t know this was common for other people. I’ve always viewed my capacity to cause what should be a sporting injury from lying in bed as a uniquely personally shameful indictment.

It also sounds like based on the preceding post that they really are going to have to do this as the initial reaction to offending their coworker seems not to have gone down well with them and their colleagues at all. It looks like they’re kind of having to do this to prevent things escalating any further which might be why their apology has needed to be workshopped and people are finding flaws in it. They’re probably having to work through a fair bit of resentment before they can find an authentic apology in themselves. Good for them though, that can take a bit of reflection and the initial instinct can be to try and issue a non-apology apology but instead they’re working through it to get it right.

A lot of the response here has been around the way the ‘apology’ focusses too much on the person who’s supposed to be receiving the apology and not the person who has something to apologise for. The intended draft follows along the classic lines of “sorry if you feel that way” which implies that the person being apologized to is really the one in the wrong for having taken offence and the apologizer is just indignant at being forced to say anything rather than actually sorry for anything.

I get all that, but… Is there no way to sincerely express being sorry for not considering or anticipating another person’s individual response to something as opposed to the thing itself? Without seemingly blaming them for that response? It’s still about the apologiser’s actions in having been inconsiderate in their deployment of language then, just not for the actual language. I ask because your proposed change “I’m going to work on improving my language” implies that the error was in using the word fuck at all and that their language is in general faulty in some way. I don’t think that’s the case. Having a manner of speech that includes that word is not something inherently bad, the bad behaviour necessitating an apology as I see it is for being too presumptive in assuming this particular person would have no problem with it when it’s known that some people might and also for not immediately taking that person’s offence seriously in the immediate aftermath when they expressed having taken offence (they didn’t take it seriously, this is a follow up post).

It seems reasonable, if expressed very carefully, to commit to avoiding the word around them, since that’s all that person can reasonably want, that’s the problematic behaviour that is getting in the way of their working together. Committing to improving their language can really only mean committing to not saying that word generally which is defacto suggesting the word itself, not the lack of consideration is the problem and also puts OP in a position now of being on the hook in future not just for using the word around this individual but in all other circumstances as well something they shouldn’t promise. If the work environment is such that nobody else speaks like this and they’re the only one then sure, it should have been common sense to begin with and such a commitment is a no brainer, but if it’s otherwise common practice and it’s just this one person they need to accommodate then that’s what should be done, accommodating this one specific person in order not to offend in future and apologising in order to let them know that you hear them and consider their feelings important.

I can’t foresee Lemmy specifically reaching levels of popularity comparable to platforms like Twitter or Reddit. Barring some very strange disastrous upheaval of the whole landscape they and their ilk will continue to be Leviathans even with decisions at the top that look like outright sabotage. There is so much inertia. Maybe those two examples might disappear, but only if they’re devoured by another just like them.

I can see Lemmy and similar Federated platforms with their quite sizeable yet comparatively miniscule user bases carrying on as they are and even growing a little bit and having some effect on the zeitgeist with the occasional piece of local culture seeping in to the wider platforms though people there will likely not know that’s where it came from. I also think efforts like Threads or likely something similar that comes after will be where the fediverse meets any mainstream success essentially becoming part of those bigger platforms in some way I can’t yet predict in detail.

The big appeal of Lemmy is ideological and technical, this will always limit the number of people drawn to it. If there weren’t already giants in this space that wouldn’t matter because there’d be a snowball effect that would draw crowds who came because of other people not because of any interest in how the platform functions or ideals to pursue and with those crowds could come more crowds until you have a critical mass. But with the situation as it is now, the big crowds that draw yet more crowds still, are elsewhere so you’ll only ever have enthusiasts or ideologues that go out of their way to be here.

You might want to try soft claws. They’re little plastic caps in the shape of a cat’s nail (except soft not pointed) that you fill with a non-toxic adhesive that comes with the pack and attach to the cat’s nails. Over time the cat naturally sheds their nails and the nail caps come off with them and you just replace them again when that happens. They say it doesn’t bother the cats and they don’t even notice but I think they’re exaggerating a bit there because my cats hate the process of having the nail put on which makes me feel bad but once it is actually on they quickly forget about it and it doesn’t bug them.

It’s not a perfect solution the claws are finicky to work with, the applicator for the adhesive gets clogged with dry glue, the cats don’t really like having the nails applied, the caps themselves are really quite expensive and some items like wooden furniture, still get damaged even with the soft claws but the damage in such cases is still greatly reduced and for soft items like a couch it pretty much stops them doing any damage.

One thing to keep in mind though, don’t buy cheap ones off eBay, they’re not worth a cent, the cats hate them for some reason, they don’t seem as well manufactured and they don’t come with little cleats inside to help lock it in place. Because the cats absolutely hate them so much and are definitely bothered by them they immediately pull them off straight after you’ve applied them and they’re just a waste of your time and an unnecessary source of stress for your poor kitty. I’ve found 2 brands that seem to actually be good and they’re both a lot more expensive then I’d like but at least you can buy a supply of several months and save your possessions from destruction. The two that worked for me are Soft Claws and Soft Paws. Claws seems slightly cheaper. I think they might actually be the same product since they have the exact same artwork and typeface for their packaging and logos and the caps themselves seem to be identical, one of them just says claws and the other paws. Weirdly enough they’ve both chosen to use Garfield on their packaging and somehow I’m fairly sure neither has paid for the privilege.

I care, usually not very much, but somewhere above zero. It’s good that they actually have something to talk about which therefore gives us something to talk about. Holidays overseas are a bit easier than kids because there’s some relatability there but whatever they’re talking about it’s usually more the person talking about it that’s interesting more than the thing. You’re already friends, so you already enjoy their insights or way of talking about things and you’ve probably been there for a fair few of their important life events so it’s nice to hear about the latest ones and how that’s shaping then today as others shaped them before.

Because I don’t have kids and wasn’t on their vacation for me there is a natural limit imposed on just how interesting it can be hence saying I don’t exactly care a whole lot, but it’s usually at least enough to make sharing a beer more satisfying.

It’d be cruel to the people around me, but I do rather like the idea of starting over every 30 years or so, your could try out so many different paths.

This is like Marge Simpson’s version of Itchy and Scratchy

It’s amazing how effectively just hearing this from someone who has firsthand insight can put it in perspective.

Further to that third point as well, there’s probably also a question simply of opportunity. You could take the Munich situation as evidence of capability, but it may also have been opportunity plus capability. Intelligence seems like it’s a pretty difficult game and perhaps the successes in operation bayonet had to do with fortunate and unlikely intelligence scoops that they have not luckedh upon this time around and can’t rely upon as a strategy. Also, while I don’t know much about the post-Munich assassinations, it sounds like they went on for over twenty years, didn’t really take out many of the actually important, directly involved individuals and a lot of the people they would have logically wanted to target successfully went in to hiding out of their reach so if the strategic goal is to behead the organisation that carried out attacks as a defensive strategy to weaken their capacity to do it again, 20 years just to take out relatively minor unimportant figures isn’t really going to work.

That said, it also looks, as many have stated, like “taking out Hamas” is more a convenient political smokescreen for a much more sinister goal so a very successful intelligence operation that rapidly took out all their leadership at once would actually run counter to their true objectives in this scenario.

Wow. That was fucked up.

I think he’s famously at least eaten a lot of McDonalds.

I don’t know how to program, but to a very limited extent can sorta kinda almost understand the logic of very short and simplistic code that’s been written for me by someone who can actually code. I tried to get to get chat GPT to write a shell script for me to work as part of an Apple shortcut. It has no idea. It was useless and ridiculously inconsistent and forgetful. It was the first and only time I used chat GPT. Not very impressed.

Given how it is smart enough to produce output that’s kind of in the area of correct, albeit still wrong and logically flawed, I would guess it could eventually be carefully prodded into making one small snippet of something someone might call “good” but at that point I feel like that’s much more an accident in the same way that someone who has memorised a lot of French vocabulary but never actually learned French might accidentally produce a coherent sentence once in a while by trying and failing 50 times before succeeding and then failing again immediately after without ever having even known.

I think you might be misunderstanding the whole advantage of the fediverse idea in the first place.

The thing is, in a scenario where it’s as big as Reddit in terms of users, most of the content on the fediverse then would be local to them so if they defederated everyone or everyone defederated them, who’d really be cut off from whom? They’d probably only be marginally less appealing to their user base who might not even know how the whole fediverse thing worked anyway.

Definitely. At least the damage could be largely limited to just that instance though. I can’t seriously imagine the people behind it letting their ideals trump profit for an extended period of time, especially with financial imperatives from the costs associated with the infrastructure required if that one instance alone had so much traffic.

Theoretically though, if it started going rancid it’d be much easier to jump ship without losing out on too much, that is unless they defederate with everyone or everyone defederates with them, either of which could be distinct possibilities. In that case, I guess you’d just have another Reddit.

Oh no! Guessing you wanted to resume?

It’s been at least 3 hours now. Which was it?

How does that work if you don’t have money or just don’t pay? I mean what are they going do? Put you in jail?