Ok, boomer Agreed, dark ager.

Hmm. Interesting, indeed. Now please excuse me while I, once again, sacrifice my own bodily fluids on the modern-age altar of fertility which has been optimized over ages and ages into the convenient shape of a… sock.

DAE remember that movie White Noise? The climax was fucking horrifying and I have to admit that it haunted me for quite a while.
For better or worse, kids today probably won’t get it.

So, everything north of the Alps, basically? That doesn’t sound right to me. I tried a vitamin D pill once but it gave me a rash immediately, which is a sign of overdosing.

A saying where I’m from goes something like: “To get old, eat soup for 100 years.”

Wait until you find out about “Stray Cat Blues.”

Nuttin No Go So
The original “football moves” clip went viral a long time ago, and the song goes along well with it. Took me a while to understand just how awfully reactionary the lyrics are.

First trillionaire when?

Nice, she got a facelift and dyed her hair black.

We Interrupt This Programme
(Yeah, I’m oldschool like that)

Next you’ll be telling me that “So, how often do you flick the bean?” is not a great pickup line.

Church events work fine, too. My buddy and me went to one in a damp basement and it was about 30 people. 100% women. Average age about 22 I guess. All were dancing. They all immediately started staring at us as if we were edible. Within the hour, my buddy met what would soon become his GF, and I was approached by this amazing girl. I then went on a string of remarkable dates with her.
The kicker: It was a Christian event, but the girls we hooked up with weren’t Christians at all.

I gotta disagree with you here. At least on the sub(s) that I still - on the occasion of big events - take a glance at. To me, Reddit comments are the epitome of staleness and predictability. Also, their user base seems like a bunch of 40-year-old dads that mentally peaked at 16, but keep getting more racist by the year.

Precisely this. From a philosophical-logical POV, it doesn’t make sense. From the POV of establishing and maintaining power/ dominance/ oppression/ hegemony, however, it’s the only thing that makes sense.

I’m certain my productivity at work dropped significantly because of this fucking upgrade. It’s slow as molasses, at times unstable and 50% of the time I send the laptop to “hibernate,” both it and me wake up to yet another update cycle, meaning it did a completely unwanted hard restart and my unsaved work has been lost without a warning. Crazy my company is paying for that shit.

Now show Uranus.

I used to be active on one of my country’s most popular forums, if ranked by daily visits. Self-help Q&A style. Apart from me, there were pretty much only three users contributing about 90% of the content. One of them being the only mod. It took me years to figure out, from the timing and the writing style of the posts, that this mod also poses nearly all of the questions and gives all of the first answers too, using a new single-use sock puppet each time.
At the start of this year, it devolved into plain attention whoring and it was really sad, so I left.

Yeah, it would be so much better if everybody was just upfront about it during anamnesis:

How, do you think, did this contraption become lodged in your rectum?
I put it up my ass.
Why did you put it up there?
It was an experiment.
What was the purpose of this experiment?
To find out what I can put up my ass.

Wow, Bruce Springsteen looks a lot rougher than he did just a few days ago.

That Absolute, see also here, is something nefarious, possibly used for industrial espionage. My company is a client and using one of its IP addresses, I could see documentation that was quite concerning. In the background, it checks all of your files for anything that looks like a password, a social security number or a credit card number, then uploads these files to some server to protect them… What’s really weird is that I cannot access the same information from an outside IP address, but here’s a review, corroborating parts of it. Make of it what you will!