Hah I totally whispered that line in the theater when it came out! The Matrix had come out recently so you just couldn’t unsee it.

I second the suggestion of befriending the dog: get some good dog treats and essentially train it. Imagine the look on the neighbor’s face if everyone is outside and the dog obeys your verbal commands. Delicious!

Ahh it’s still available! linky

A keyboard is essential so it’s not mobile appropriate.

Isn’t this game made by the same person/group that did QWOP and GIRP? Man I miss girp that was the first and only game I tried speedrunning.

(Apologies for ChatGPT, I’m not a great writer, but I couldn’t help but imagine what this would be like haha)

INT. KLINGON QUARTERS - DAY

Gowron, the fierce Klingon leader, stands before an easel with a paintbrush in hand. Worf, the stoic Klingon warrior, reluctantly joins him.

GOWRON (roaring) Today, Worf! We paint the glory of battle, the splatter of blood on our blades!

Worf scowls but follows Gowron’s lead, dipping his brush into the vibrant red paint.

GOWRON (CONT’D) (roaring) Now, Worf, let the brush roar like a disruptor, leaving chaos in its wake!

Worf hesitates, then starts applying the paint with a fierce stroke.

GOWRON (CONT’D) (roaring) Excellent! Let the canvas be a battleground, where each stroke is a strike against our enemies!

Gowron continues with his Klingon interpretation of Bob Ross’s techniques, creating a chaotic masterpiece. Worf struggles to keep up.

WORF (grumbling) This is not the way of warriors, Gowron. We do not paint. We conquer!

GOWRON (roaring with laughter) But, Worf! Conquer your canvas, let the colors scream like a victorious war cry!

Worf grumbles, attempting to make his battlefield scene more ferocious.

GOWRON (CONT’D) (roaring) Remember, Worf! Each brushstroke is like the roar of a targ, wild and untamed!

Worf, frustrated, accidentally smears paint across his forehead while brushing his hair back. Gowron bursts into laughter.

GOWRON (CONT’D) (roaring with laughter) See, Worf? Even the mishaps become battle scars on the canvas!

Worf glares at Gowron, the painting resembling a chaotic battle scene mixed with unintentional comic elements.

WORF (displeased) This is not the Klingon way, Gowron.

GOWRON (grinning) (roaring) Ah, but Worf! Sometimes, the true warrior finds honor in unexpected places. Art knows no limits!

I did something similar. I would get about as far as writing the interesting mechanic/game logic and then give up.

I really hope someone has the skills to make a super cut video of this!

Yeah seriously. The day news of this broke, I switched my book library over to Calibre+DeDRM and put my device in airplane mode.