Do you even lift shitpost bro?

Makes me think of the “My name’s Buck and I’m here to fuck” scene in Kill Bill.

Demi Moore, Julianne Moore, and idk but probably has the last name Moore

If you like Museums:

• Museum of Fine Arts (1001 Bissonnet St)
• Houston Museum of Natural Science (5555 Hermann Park Dr)
• The Menil (1533 Sul Ross St)

Space Center Houston (the tourist wing of NASA’s Johnson Space Center) is a great place to visit.

If you like big spectacle places, see if you can take a tour of Minute Maid Park (Astros baseball stadium) or NRG Stadium (Texans football stadium).

If you enjoy live theater, options include:

• The Hobby Center (800 Bagby St)
• The Alley Theater (615 Texas Ave)
• Stages (800 Rosine St)

If you think you’ll have the appetite for it, there are lots of good dining options at every price point from a wide variety of culinary traditions. Try some bbq (if you’re from Saudi there are at least some halal bbq options, we have a pretty sizeable halal crowd). Try some Texmex restaurants. Try a pho restaurant. Try a taco truck.

Take a tour of the Hermann Park Zoo (6200 Hermann Park Dr). It’s a big damn zoo with a lot to see. You could also head down to Galveston and visit the Moody Gardens (1 Hope Blvd in Galveston). They have a giant rainforest pyramid and a giant aquarium pyramid. There are a lot of good dining options in Galveston but I don’t know offhand whether any of them are explicitly halal.

Good luck with your visit. The Texas Medical Center has some of the best medical care in the world. I hope you kick cancer’s ass.

Lemmy for scratching the reddit itch

Facebook (by way of a disabled account) for archiving pictures of now-deceased family members

Discord, if it counts as social media, for tracking guilds for a game I used to be addicted to, also servers for subreddits I used to frequent & servers maintained by some of the fanfiction authors I follow

Knock knock

Who’s there?

Who.

Who who?

You’re making a good owl!

My parents told me this was my favorite joke when I was around your daughter’s age. Apparently I used the joke non-stop and my parents still laughed every time because of how much I cracked up at my own joke.

Feeling your butt cheeks on the toilet seat just before you lose the battle to hold everything in.

Ned is a lucky bastard, I’ve never gotten to hold more than two kittens at the same time.

Navy seals are a bunch of fucking arrogant chodes

• in my jurisdiction, you have to meet certain criteria to be eligible for a mail in ballot, they don’t just get handed out willy nilly
• i don’t trust the post office with anything vitally important, like a ballot or money
• the early voting place is pretty close to my work, close enough that i hit it up a week and change ago on my lunch break

Don’t they each win like ten cents or something?

Lol I didn’t realize that the pankakke version wasn’t the original.

It’s a tongue in cheek way of referring to neurodivergence. The same way that someone might refer to neurotypical as neurobland.

Not having any signs or traits of being neurospicy

I <3 Tamago

<3 Bitty

Do you have a recent picture of her you’re willing to share?

Anyone have a guess as to what the bottom left picture might be? Just looks like some weird stairs.

Yes, it crashed Voyager for me almost instantly.

I once drove drunk. This was long enough ago the statute of limitations has expired. I shouldn’t have done it, I was really lucky that I didn’t hurt someone or get arrested. For the next 15ish years that I still drank, my limit was 1 drink if I was driving.

This was before Uber & Lyft were a thing, but I still could’ve made arrangements with the bar manager “look dude your bartenders kept serving me when I was visibly drunk, so let me leave my car here overnight without towing it so I can take a cab home, and I won’t say shit to anyone.”

I’d always heard if you’re presenting in front of a crowd and rip a fart, say something to the effect of “I was hoping to finish with a bang, not start with one.” But I’m not sure how relevant that is for OP’s situation.