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He was Bankman, now he’s Fried
Come Mr. Bankman, bank me crypto-bonanza…
slow clap
Don’t steal from the rich
But we can still steal from the poor right?
No problem there!
Phew! I was worried there for a second! Good to know I’ll continue to face no consequences!
Unless you’re poor too
Poor stealing from poor is a capital offense.
Steal? No, it’s a clever business model where I convince you to buy dogshit because dogshit will be worth x10 next month and I’m definitely not dumping all my dogshit once you poors drive the price up.
No, it’s the even more clever business model where I convince half my employees that if they just work a few extra minutes a day off the clock or work through their legally mandated lunch breaks, but still allow me to automatically deduct their pay for the break, then someday I’ll notice all their hard work and reward them for it… someday.
Friendly reminder that wage theft outweighs all other robberies combined:
https://www.workingnowandthen.com/blog/wage-theft-the-50-billion-crime-against-workers/
It’s encouraged!
Minor fines may be involved and a stern “that’s a no-no!” from a regulatory organization.
Especially if you’re rich! In fact it’s much safer that way.
Of course! Society isn’t going crazy.
The Shkreli Principle
I would simply have not given real money to some company in the Bahamas in exchange for a token and a promise the token would be good for more money later. But I’m street smart like that.
They didn’t make their own crypto coin.
I remember finding them in a list where they offered something like 8% interest if you deposited your bitcoins with them which was still fishy as hell. It looked like a sweet deal but I wondered how they managed to do that sustainably. I guess the answer was “they didn’t”.
I think you’re thinking about Celsius. SBF absolutely had his own coin, and it is tantamount to the whole FTX collapse. Their competitor owned a shit load of it, it was called FTT iirc. He then just decided to tweet out that they were selling all their FTT, and then everyone started selling FTT which started a run on the token.
The company also pumped FTT and other tokens value through their hedge fund Alameda research. The man deserves every last day of sentencing.
I think you’re right. I must be mixing up all these crypto-based scams.
It’s almost like crypto itself is one giant Ponzi scheme?! Forget I said that. It’s tHe FutUrE
Also, be glad you didn’t put money in Celsius. I have a friend that did for the interest that they were offering. It worked… Til it didn’t. He lost $50k.
Yet people do the same thing with literal U.S. dollars and we think nothing of it when banks lose billions gambling our money in the stock market. 🤔
Or open credit cards in their customers’ names without their consent.
Or tear down whole economies with no consequences. Or take almost complete control of the housing market and turn Americans into serfs. Or…
Strange, that that fat fuck is only being held accountable because he used bitcoins to do the same things banks do on the regular. Strange indeed…
People absolutely think something about it when it happens, and hell sometimes the government even does something about it (as demonstrated in the article you linked). Just a whole lot of us would argue they don’t do enough about it.
I’m not actually defending Sam Bankman-Fried. I’m pointing out the obvious hypocrisy in the system. Both that fat fuck and actual bank execs need to waste away in prison cells.
He is set to be sentenced by Judge Lewis Kaplan on March 28th of next year and faces decades in prison.
What a tease. Hurry up!
There is another trial on additional charges before then.
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“Originally placed under house arrest, he was sent to jail in August for violations of his bail conditions, including using a VPN to watch a football game and leaking the diary entries of his ex-girlfriend”
Ok I get the diary, that’s shitty…but using a VPN to watch football? That’s a normal Saturday afternoon.
Not when you could be also using that vpn to communicate with people without them knowing
He also got caught sending some cryptic messages to someone saying something along the lines of getting their stories straight.
He said he had concluded that Mr. Bankman-Fried’s communication with the media and a separate attempt to contact a former FTX employee were intended to “intimidate or also to influence” witnesses in the case.
https://www.nytimes.com/2023/08/11/technology/sam-bankman-fried-jail.html
When you’ve got bail conditions on the order of roughly a lifetime’s income riding on not using a VPN, I think you can skip football for a while.
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He can claim it was to watch football, doesn’t mean it was.
Can we do some more CEOs and bankers, now? Start a trend. Keep the ball rolling. Puhleeeze.
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And they’ll continue to commit fraud until they can’t kick the can anymore. Then they kick us because they have everything anyway.
No they won’t. There’s way more of us. They’ll take serious action and make heavy weights testify before congress. Court cases will follow and the news and speculation will be dizzying. Then as the trials slowly work their way through the courts they will be found not guilty or face mild slaps on the wrist or have to resign from ceo to a lesser role like vice ceo. And which ever rich person stole the most from other rich people will be thrown to wolves and the cycle will continue for another decade.
Most CEOs and bankers know they can’t screw each other. It’s only okay to screw the little guys.
At least Bernie got away with his scam for decades. He was an old old man who had lived a full life by the time he went to prison. Sammy? Not so much
Try to incite an insurrection and steal an election: you’ll walk away with no consequences.
Steal money from the rich: you will burn.
Trump’s still on trial. I’m sure he’ll go to jail for something or other.
He won’t.
See Anna Sorokin, or Elizabeth Holmes.
Or for the elders among us, Nick Leeson. He didn’t even steal the money, he just fucked up.
Has Holmes even gone to jail yet? She got knocked up twice to dodge prison
There it is.
So, will all the conservative chuds who were convinced he was going to walk because he donates to the Democrats do any kind of follow-up on that theory?
“We got him, despite the DEMONRATS”
Demonrats sounds like either a biker gang or a punk rock band lol
Not your keys, not your coins
He should have committed to the personality.
He should have been playing League of Legends, bronze tier, on a laptop during the trial, while wearing cargo shorts and sipping whatever his silly energy drink was.
Definitely. I’m sure the court would be happy to throw in a contempt charge on top of his sentence for fraud.
That is what happens when you steal from the rich.
Finally some actual good news for a change, let me break out the bubbles! 🍾🥂
While reading your comment I somehow managed to overlook the emojis initially and I just pictured you running outside with a bubble wand and a container of soapy water to celebrate.
Sam Bad-Bankman Fraud
Sam Bankman Not Freed
Scamuel Brokeman Fraud
So, so guilty.
I can’t be the only one always making this ‘Sam Bankman-Fraud’ in my head when reading his name.
I read is as “Fried” (as it Kentucky Fried Chicken).
