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Characters who don’t communicate. And not in a “bad relationship bad communication”, I mean all of the cliches and tropes of “Oh my god if you said 2 words we could wrap this craptastic movie up right now” but they just have to drag out one more conflict.
A masterclass in this is the TV show FROM. Jesus Christ, it’s so bad in this aspect.
I don’t think it’s interesting to get pissed off at villains. That’s their point. Yes, it’s very easy to hate Dolores Umbridge. You’re supposed to. I want to hear from the people that hate Garp, or Forrest Gump.
I’ll start. Bill Shatner pissed me the fuck off as Captain Kirk. Part of it is backward-projecting from what the Federation became into the sexist shit they were doing in the 60s, but a much bigger part of it was from his SNL skit where he told fans to “get a life.”
If you want to deepen and broaden your hatred for Shatner, watch “The Captains,” where he interviews Patrick Stewart, Avery Brooks, Kate Mulgrew, and Chris Pine and comes off as a pompous, sexist asshole.
Also, Avery Brooks makes Shatner look like a fucking dweeb, which is worth it.
I am going to add that to my hate-watch list.
I hate Jenny from Forrest Gump. But I’m sure plenty of wounded men share that perspective.
I used to hate Jenny but I have more sympathy for her now. She’s a scared, broken person too.
I agree. Jenny is not someone any of us (sisters, brothers, or others) would want to be. I think that we can identify with Forrest, but Jenny is truly broken. She’s not dumping him to go live some fabulous lifestyle. She’s on a completely self destructive arc while Forrest goes from strength to strength, even when suffering the loss of friends and family.
When you think about it, I can’t think of anyone wishing their life was like Jenny’s rather than like Forrest’s. Even taking the money and shit out of it, I know which I’d prefer.
The correct answer is Grandpa Joe from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, truly a selfish and awful man
The movies did him dirty. He’s a pretty good guy in the book.
That and people forgetting the movie trope of absolute joy being a panacea also doing him dirty.
It’s a story about a magical chocolate factory staffed by orange skinned green haired dwarf humans, is it really that much harder to believe that an old man suddenly regained the will to live from hearing he had a chance to finally get closure over being kicked out of a career which paid well and that he loved participating in?
True and fair, question was movies though, and he does suck in at least the Gene Wilder one, didn’t really care to see the new ones
Tim from Jurassic Park (film).
The raptor is trying to get through the door and eat everyone, your sister is busy trying to hack the system, and the two adults are trying like hell to keep the door closed while also trying to reach the shotgun.
What does he do? Hand them the gun? Use his, until this very moment useless, dead weight to help hold the door? Nope, just hops up and down.
You’re dead weight, Timmy.
I’ll tell you who pisses me off from Jurassic Park - Michael fucking Crichton.
So, I know the guy Ian Malcolm was based on. He’s a complexity theorist I worked with a bit. Jeff Goldblum famously (in our tiny science community) called him but rather than asking about things like chaos theory he just asked about the guys family and stuff. In retrospect it makes sense, but the guy was really thrown by someone not wanting to talk about chaos theory.
Anyway - Michael Crichton was a fucking asshole. I want you to hear that in the voice of your favorite character from What We Do in the Shadows. He turned into a conspiracy theorist, wrote that weird grey goo book about nanotechnology, and was generally just an unpleasant person who thought his intelligence was significantly higher than it actually was, as demonstrated when people actually tried to talk to him about complexity theory.
I was actually a fan of his work until I started working there and his brain headed south like a monarch butterfly on crack.
I was a fan of his work until now. Damn it. lol
Just wait till you read the book and find out how much of a dead weight some of those people are.
Oh I have. But the post was about movie characters so I stuck to that lol. Don’t get me started on Ed Regis.
Forced romantic interest that were clearly the idea of some dipshit exec who wants to play it safe with generic audiences by inserting every cliche they can think of.
But, what if they just stayed good friends?
Insert guy getting defenestrated.
They do that sometimes to good effect.
Theres a lot of “will they, wont they” and then, nope they dont.
One of my favorite things from 30 Rock - they didn’t force any of the main characters together. They even had Kim Jong Il talk directly to the camera at the end of an episode telling the writers not to overthink it and have Jack and Liz get together.
That is one of my favorite jokes as they’re mocking fans who wanted them to get together.
Obvious exposition dumbass who needs breathing explained to him coming in a close second.
My favorite non-example of this was in Mr Robot. The main character starts explaining something and the other character just says something like “we know what a raspberry pi is jackass” and it was fantastic.
People who come into a home, or leave it and never close the door. WTF?
Moms everywhere after slaving hours in the kitchen preparing a banquet breakfast feast for her family of three, watching her son grab a bagel because they’re late for school: “ … Have a good day sweetie! Guess I’ll throw this in the trash.”
Dad looking up from the newspaper with stock quotes: “Oops, I’m late for the business factory. Bye, honey!”
Moms: “I hate my life, it’s like I’m living in a TV trope!”
That happens a lot in The Sopranos. I like to think of it as a power move and find it hilarious.
Every scene with a person who eats loudly
If you aren’t already aware, you may have misophonia. You aren’t alone or crazy.
Is there something you can actually do about this or do I have to just grit my teeth and try to disassociate every time I have a meal with another human being?
There are far better reasons to hate Denethor.
Dumble-freaking-dore! The things they let Dumbledore shrug his shoulders at for the sake of the plot turns me off story-wise, and at times the story forces aspects about him to matter.
Thats cause Rowling is a Terrible author
They killed the troll, 100 points for Gryffindor
Yeah okay, but WHY did the troll get out. How are we going to stop this from happening in the future? How can we ensure the kids never wind up petrified, entered into some sort of competition against their will despite being under age, drowned, or killed by three headed dogs, giant bird horse things or basilisks?
Doesn’t matter, Gryffindor wins!
Not a movie, but Q from Star Trek Next Generation.
This confuses me because Q episodes are my favorites
That pink cunt from Harry Potter. You know who I mean.
Also there’s nurse Ratchet from One Flew Over the Cookoos Nest. Same vibe.
Nurse Ratchet then went on to play a Bible thumping Bajoran in Deep Space Nine, and brought that vibe with her.
My child, you are ignorant and know not what you say but only because you have not opened your heart to the Prophets. I thumped the orbs not this book you speak of.
“Thumped the orbs” sounds like a very specific fetish, but you do you, Eminence…
The Jigsaw Killer family, grade A llama feed but Jesus fucking christ are they all just the WORST people imaginable.
Even the supposed purist Kramer himself regularly set up traps that were just completely unfair like setting a timer on the razer maze or leaving Adam’s key where he’d have had no chance to realize where it was before he “failed” the test.
Like seriously, for all his waxing philosophical, he has NO concept of how a human mind functions when panicking, including how a solid 3rd of the adrenaline response is FREEZE, the saw traps Kramer designs are guaranteed to kill at least a 3rd of all participants assuming it’s an even split which way you go when you start freaking out because a serial killer kidnapped you and strapped you into a death game where you have to literally maim yourself to survive.
To say nothing of Amanda, who’s just a lunatic vigilante projecting her own worthlessness onto everyone that ends up in Kramer’s crosshairs, Hoffman who thinks any trap where a woman dies for no reason is an astounding success story, and Jill who is just so blisteringly stupid that she honestly deserved to die like an idiot for how little she did to even try and establish a line of communication with Gordon, the guy in charge of shutting Hoffman down if he ever became a threat to her, who himself is a moron for never using his supposed influence as the secret true heir and medical expertise to advise Kramer what the victims would physically be able to actually win at.
And then there’s the super DUPER secret apprentice Logan who fucks everything up so spectacularly he can’t even get the catchphrase right!
Popeye Doyle in The French Connection. Sure he’s the protagonist, but he’s also a huge piece of shit.
I cannot watch that movie because of how much I don’t give a fuck about the characters
Shiv, from Succession. (Series, not Movie)
Look, I fully understand the character and why she is the way she is and reacts the way she does, but understanding does not make her any less toxic. Kendall put it most succinctly. “Cunt is as cunt does”, and her doings were foul.
EDIT: From movies…any character portrayed by Will Smith (opinion well predates “the slap” ).
Every fucking one from a series of unfortunate events series even the kids who are potrayed as genius are stupid fucks who are irritating beyond human comprehension like everyone and i mean everyone . I know you said movie but i hated this series so much i stopped without even completing a season.
All of them right now. There is nothing I want to see because it’s not quality stuff or interesting to me. It would be nice to have something new to watch that is actually good.
