• Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
      17·
      2 days ago

      Fuck if I know! We fuckin curse all fuckin day at my fuckin job! Everybody fuckin hears us curse up a fuckin storm every fuckin day! Nobody fuckin gives a flying fuck!

      You need a fuckin job? I could fucking get you in. If you’re fucking gal, you’ll be a fuckin Disney princess. If you’re fucking guy, you’ll probably be a storm trooper.

      Then you’ll sing all day “Do you fucking want to build a god damn snowman?”

      And kids will be little cunts. They’ll say “That’s not how the song gooooeeeesssss” and you’ll tell them “Hey! Fuckstain! Who’s fuckin singing da song right now? Me or you? Me or you? Yeah, that’s right. Fuck off!”

      And the parents all clap because they want so badly to talk to their kids that way. They regret taking the creampie instead of swallowing.

    • Chris@feddit.ukOPEnglish
      26·
      2 days ago

      It’s not really, but it’s the only content warning option on Lemmy, so that’s where we are.

  • shalafi@lemmy.worldEnglish
    4·
    2 days ago

    That’s me in the woods, word for word.

    Also, I saw a fucking coyote for the first time yesterday!

    • SippyCup@feddit.nlEnglish
      2·
      2 days ago

      Aren’t they cool??

      Coyotes being were a pretty common sight growing up and I still get excited when I see them. Big ole scaredy danger puppies. Like leave them alone but they’ll run like a bitch if you try to get close. Or if a car backfires. Or starts somewhere within a mile. Or a puppy barks.

      • shalafi@lemmy.worldEnglish
        1·
        2 hours ago

        Thought it might be an asshole dog on the loose. Seemed pale and large for a coyote. Drew my pistol, took a knee and rested it on my thigh.

        After he was gone, found two tracks where he ran 180° away from my position. Clearly not a dog! LOL, he was setting off more coyotes and dogs, just running around living his best life.