You guys, WiFi isn’t magic it’s science so you must sacrifice a Scientist.
The hamster has a PhD
Fuck. I’ve been using one with an M.D. No wonder it wasn’t working.
Does it have to be a good one or will one that’s shilling for fossil fuel interests do?
#TwoBirds #Efficiency
So the hamster is magic?

I dunno when it became the norm to say the WiFi’s down when it’s actually totally fine and unrelated to the internet connection being down.
People at my work have said this even though they’re using docks plugged with Cat 5.
Probably because ISPs like to fob you off with suggestions of poor wifi rather than address the actual internet issue you contact them about.
Non-technical people don’t have any idea what a LAN is, and can’t imagine any reason for WiFi to exist other than to get their device on the Internet.
So WiFi becomes a synonym for “Internet connection”, perfectly interchangeably.
And in most operating systems the wifi icon turns into some other error icon if there’s no internet. So I can see the confusion.
At least they mention wifi.
Too many times they just say “my computer does not work”. And then you have to pull the actual problem out of them. It is like they don’t want it to be fixed.
Have you tried to turn it off and on again?

Oh, the machine god is down again.
Wifi being down is just a minor inconvenience for tech oriented people. Spare some lives and just contact your local geek/nerd.

Or just learn how the god damned devices you use work.
I do not understand how it became so normalized to just not bother with knowing how anything works. It’s not like this is a new thing either. So many old jokes surrounding people’s VCR clocks not being set.
At least it’s giving me job security. I’m a middle age geek that worked low level IT most of my life, thinking the younger generations would know how computers work and be able to fix small issues on their own. Hah.
Your wifi probably isn’t even down. Most of the time its your ISP and you just don’t know the difference between WiFi and internet.
Internet down? That’s ok I have stuff on my jellyfin.
I even have a plan when there are power outages. The hard drive that contains most of the media I collected over the years is external. In case of power outage I can power it with a power bank and a USB-C PD to 12v adapter.
But this probably reads like wizardry for people that equate wifi to internet.
Rogers is down right now and I’m this close to grabbing the neighbor’s cat to do this.
First of all, fuck Rogers with a rusty statue of a cactus, and second, fuck them again.
I don’t understand how a company that big can be that bad at uptime. I moved to Teksavvy years ago and haven’t had any outages since. I refuse to do direct business with any of the big three.
What’s Teksavvy and how can I get it?
ISP. They they piggyback off Rogers/Cogeco/whoever for the last mile connection, but in my experience have been more reliable and haven’t had any of the downtime that Rogers has.
If you it’s your neighborhood cat, then it’s probably only cat 1 or cat 2, so it won’t be of much use to you unless you wanna play Zork on your local community college’s mainframe. That might work.
Back in the day, the fuzzy ones had to sacrifice bandwidth for cuteness.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
You must appease the Machine Spirits.
Get the Magos in here!
I have already started burning the sacred incense.

Most importantly is the timing of the bell tolls. Once before drawing the circle and placing the candles, Twice as you are placing the sacrifice, and thrice while singing praise to the tech God.
Don’t worry. The magic ‘may’ return.
My boss never gets me a hamster when I’m down.
Try being as important as wifi






